Posted by: michellemuldoon | September 28, 2010

Of Two Minds

No, I’m not suggesting I have two personalities. I’m talking about the two minds one must have, when writing, and creating film. 

When I started writing, I was burning through ideas and scripts in a really quick clip. I found I could spend an entire weekend writing, living in that creative zone that feels like time stands still and the universe is laid out before you like an Escher print; it weaves, it turns, it scales incredible heights, yet all the time, feels incredibly simplistic. When I’m in that zone, it’s like things just pop out of my mind and find their way effortlessly into the puzzle that is script  structure. It’s an amazing space to find yourself living in.

When I started making my own projects, I found I became less prolific as a writer. The only way I could describe it is, it takes a different part of your brain to produce and direct a short film (plus market it), than it takes to let your imagination roam across multiple levels of your subconscious.

I began to feel like I had two minds; one focused and organized, the other unstructured, screaming for a chance to fly. At first, I found it difficult to balance. Now, I think about ways to make them work together, so that I can still let my creativity blossom, while building the foundation that holds up a filming schedule.

When I feel balanced between the structure of producing, and the freedom of writing, I feel thoroughly engaged by my life in film. And when that happens, I feel completely self-actualized.  It’s as if balancing my efforts in film, is like balancing my life.  If I can bring all of myself, committed and focused, to the process of moving forward with a project, then something really beautiful will come from the efforts.

As Hannibal from The A Team (loved George Peppard) used to say…. I love it when a plan comes together.

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